This One Cat and Girl Comic:

Still Funny!

The 1st Banner Ad On The Internet

According to Adland, this was part of AT&T's 1994 "You will" campaign and it was made by TANGENT Design/Communications of Westport, CT. Specifically, copy by Joe McCambley, the creative director of Modem Media, with graphic design by Craig Kanarick of TANGENT Design (pre-razorfish). The internet has come a long way !!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!1!

Han Shot First!

Why did George Lucas have to redo all these scenes so that Han Solo is more of a goody-two-shoes? Que ridículo!

The Truculent Hilarity of 4CHAN Conservatives

The above animated GIF reminded me recently of this actual RNC ad that was running after Barry O.'s speech in Berlin:



I'm slightly weirded out by the crass, low-budget sophistication in both cases; how they appeal on the visceral, gut-level of an internet meme without discussing anything directly — in the first instance Obama-as-Zoolander-scale-pretty-boy-doofus (with iced lattes! Talking Point Bonus!) and in the second instance Obama-as-cocky-pretty-boy-doofus-Leonardo-Decaprio (with internationalist "King of the World" delusions! Another TPB!).

The second also seems to focus on painting Obama's supporters as Far Left, Eurotrash morans — in a way that is intentionally unfair, hilarious and basically what the Daily Show and Sascha Baron Cohen have been doing for over a decade now. This leaves me with the sinking feeling that after several botched attempts, we are coming closer to a world with a successful conservative Daily Show.

A la Greg Sargent's recent analysis — there is also the possibility that this ad was meant to work in some amazing way I never could have imagined.

Chinese Youths Crazy for English Alphabet Tattoos

I am just posting this hilarious bit of satire without comment:

“The guy at the tattoo shop told me this means brave and proud warrior in English,” said beaming Beijing teenager Hao Tsang as he pointed to the letters GARF freshly inked onto his left bicep. “It’s perfect for me because I am very bold and confident, yet spiritual.”

Tsang’s friend Yuan Chi Hao also went under the needle for some English language characters. “Mine simply says FRUNK. The letters are so beautiful and flow so smoothly into each other. The word actually means old soul with young spirit in English. How cool is that?”

Apparently, very cool.

Throngs of Chinese youths are flocking to tattoo parlors looking to colorfully emboss their bodies with “meaningful” English language words.

“I couldn’t decide between CRYMPH or DLECH,” said Chengdu high school student Mingmei Lee. “I know they both mean beautiful flower dancing in the wind in American, but I can’t decide what looks prettier.”

[Thanks, Emily Z.!]

MOVED A DAY (CUZ OF RAIN)!!!! THIS SUNDAY!!!!!! August 31th!!!!!!! 2:30pm!!!

THIS SUNDAY!!!!!! August 31th!!!!!!! 2:30pm!!!

I'm subletting my apt. to pursue cartooning (and general journalistic/historical/scientific weirdness) FULL TIME!

WHICH MEANS there is only one weekend left to throw an amazing BBQ STUNT* SPECTACULAR on my roof celebrating my 25 and 3/4's years of being alive!

Even though I haven't thrown my own birthday-related party since inviting my whole class to see "Back to the Future Part II" in the theater — I will attempt to have lots of delicious things for everyone! (but please bring Foods and Drinks, also, to meet demand.)

ALSO: There will be music, and a kids' pool on the roof. Does that cover everything?

IT DOESN'T: MESSAGE ME ON MYSPACE OR FACEBOOK FOR DETAILS.

*Due to a recent Park Slope Council ordinance, an area-wide moratorium on spectacular stunt permits is in effect until the next calendar year. In compliance with this there will be no stunts at Matthew Phelan's 25th and 3/4 Anniversary Stunt Spectacular.

Context-Free

[Unless you really care to know more.]

Gangbangers.

I Want Every Issue Of This 'ZIne

The Hermenaut, produced by some of the sharpest Gen-X academics, IMHFO.

The Writing Spoon

I don't want to ruin this with a lot of talk.


[via creator Julia Mariscal, comely 26 yr old Spanish artist]

Banksy Comes To New Orleans

Weirdly touching graffiti bullshit from a gentleman I frequently debate the earnestness and relevance of. Ever since his secret (nerdy) identity has been allegedly discovered, everything about him feels just slightly more endearing and slightly less Nathan Barley.

New(ish) Band of Outsiders Clothes

AG says:

Michelle Williams plays a snoop in the home of interior designer Paul Fortunes. Scott Sternberg, the designer for Band of Outsiders dressed Michelle in his boy line which debuted in LA's Opening Ceremony August 15th. Sternberg also snapped all these Polaroids himself with no makeup, no hair, no lighting, just a 70's era polaroid and what looks like a nicely packed bar.

[via Gluda finds Lulu]

Recent Audio of MTV's Explanation For Turning Down A Paid Adbusters Ad

It's obvious, but still funny.

I've Had It With These Mutha' Effing Dogs On This Mutha' Effin' Plane

[via this]

Another Headache For My Historical Fiction Cartooning Aspirations

The zoo that is our nation's monetary past. Daunting, but also a very exciting opportunity for bad-ass accuracy in a graphic novel. [Via the near totally collapsed Disinfo website.]

THIS SATURDAY!!!!!! August 30th!!!!!!! 2:30pm!!!

I'm subletting my apt. to pursue cartooning (and general journalistic/historical/scientific weirdness) FULL TIME!

WHICH MEANS there is only one weekend left to throw an amazing BBQ STUNT* SPECTACULAR on my roof celebrating my 25 and 3/4's years of being alive!

Even though I haven't thrown my own birthday-related party since inviting my whole class to see "Back to the Future Part II" in the theater — I will attempt to have lots of delicious things for everyone! (but please bring Foods and Drinks, also, to meet demand.)

ALSO: There will be music, and a kids' pool on the roof. Does that cover everything?

IT DOESN'T: MESSAGE ME ON MYSPACE OR FACEBOOK FOR DETAILS.

*Due to a recent Park Slope Council ordinance, an area-wide moratorium on spectacular stunt permits is in effect until the next calendar year. In compliance with this there will be no stunts at Matthew Phelan's 25th and 3/4 Anniversary Stunt Spectacular.

The Dark Spiderman

Calling all H.P. Lovecraft Readers

I need you to let me know if this is an accurate imitation — or merely Lemony Snicket-style gothic camp masquerading as a highly specific and intellectually engaged parody:

SELECTIONS FROM
H.P. LOVECRAFT'S
BRIEF TENURE AS A
WHITMAN'S SAMPLER
COPYWRITER

[Excerpt:]

Chocolate Cherry Cordial
You must not think me mad when
I tell you what I found below the
thin shell of chocolate used to disguise
this bonbon's true face. Yes!

Hidden beneath its rich exterior
is a hideously moist cherry cordial!
What deranged architect could have
engineered this non-Euclidean aberration?
I dare not speculate.

Yeah, no kidding it's from McSweeney's. [via Maud Newton]

Daily Show Billboard Greeting RNC Near The Twin Cities Airport

Joe Biden Adds Seniority and Sass

I almost donated today — because the tricky email announcement to supporters naming Barry O.'s VP leads to an inspiring fundraising prompt. (I gave them plenty of information on how to contact and bother me later, though. So, once I do my monthly budget, I'll probably drop some coin.) Here's Biden at the Philadelphia Debate last year talking about putting a brick through the other guy’s windshield; talking about taking it out and chopping it up.



As would be expected, here's McCain's people pointing out that way back in 2005, Biden would have been happy to run with McCain. You remember: the version of John McCain that could have plausibly been construed as a maverick; the one who ran against George W. Bush.

Nephew of Mumbai Underworld Don Extorts Chandelier Industry

It's sort of embarrassing hilarious that Sachin Shete, the nephew of infamous crime figure Gurunath Narhari "Guru" Satam (whose mugshot is on the right), is going after interior decoration companies:

According to the complaint filed by Joseph Alex Thomas, 41, Shete has been threatening his sister Rita to hand over her chandelier business to him.

Rita had started the business a few years ago and Shete had forced her to make him a partner. [...]

Senior inspector Ambadas Gadade said, “When Rita refused to hand over the business to him, Shete told her that he would call up his uncle Guru Satam and get her killed.”

Ignoring how totally 3rd-grade that threat is, Shete should know that gangsters with chandeliers are asking for trouble:


[Via Daily News & Analysis and the Times of India]

Hey, Buddy? Ergonomic Cup Of Joe?

"The shape breaks free of a nearly universal design constraint of cups, the linear vertical axis."

Designed by award-winning artist David Pier, this ergonomic coffee mug has no funny sayings on it or anything. Plus, it looks weird. According to Pier, from the website:

By using a different approach to the design process I developed a revolutionary cup that is unusual and beautiful in appearance and superior in function. The form flows from the shape of hand and mouth, the weight and volume of the contained fluid, and the relations between these. The undulating rim fits the lips better and prevents spills on the side opposite the handle. A level rim would be easy for the factory but would lessen the user’sexperience. The design no longer is dictated by the manufacturing process. The oval body brings the center of gravity closer to the hand. The shape helps make the strong porcelain even more resistant to breakage. The shape is attractive and interesting from any angle. The handle and body can be held in several ways, all more comfortable than traditional mugs.

[Thanks, Jess! This is, excuse me, a damn fine cup of coffee.]

Mega Man 9 Will Be The Awesomest Thing

Everything about this is going to be good — from the retro-advertising (pictured above. Click to huge.) via I Am 8-bit artist Gerald de Jesus, to the classic 8-bit graphics, to the game play (which is rumored to be as hard and unforgiving as the original 3 Mega Man titles). My X-mas to New Year's is effectively booked. Here's the trailer. Get excited! Lose your sh*t!

More Funny Things [Banner Ads]

[Via Gallery of the Absurd]

Rove/Edwards September Smackdown!

I am super excited about seeing these titans debate in a college auditorium: John Edwards & Karl Rove — Friday, 9/26/08, 8 pm, Alumni Arena University at Buffalo!!!1!! Tickets go on sale tomorrow morning! (I'm already practicing my "Don't Tase Me, Bro!")